Thursday, November 10, 2011

Ke11y Slater's 11.5th World Title

Can you imagine what it would be like if your whole life you thought your Birthday was on April 20th but then some rando informs you that it's actually on the 21st?  Or what if Publisher's Clearing House came to your lad pad with a check for 150K, busted down your door, threw animal balloons in your face, and had Chris Hanson sit you down only to find out that the check was made out to your neighbor?  The list of jokes could go on about Ke11y Slater's 11th and 11.5th World Title and the unfortunate miscalculation that now makes us surfers look way more stoopider than we already are...

November 6th, a brisk Sunday in the Bay, I was frothing in my snow boots trying to get my lurk on at Rip Curl's 7th Official Search Contest.  Only needing to win one more heat to Officially clench his 11th World Title, the pressure was on for King Slates as he set froth forth to shred against up-and-coming super groms: Miguel Pupo and Gabriel "Funky Cold" Medina (the eventual winner of the comp).  As the three set to the sea, people from far and wide flocked to the water's edge to witness the official crowning of Ke11y's 11th World Title, this time fo reals...

As you can see, the competition was fierce but the uber groms (who were probably soiling themselves in their nighties by the time Kelly was getting his 8th World Title) were no match to Slater's backside floats, frontside hacks, and a barrell just after the buzzer that proved yet again why Kelly is hands down the best surfer that ever lived and put to rest any jokes about his initial Title Fart Farce.  Rightfully so, Kelly was re-crowned and the masses frothed harder in amazement than they ever have before...

From Curren's' generation to the momentum generation, Andy's generation to the new wave Dane x Jordy generation, and now the John John x Kolohe x Medina grom generation - Kelly has straight up schooled, fooled, ruled, and ridiculed beyond any comparison; and it doesn't seem like he's planning on leaving his empire of dominance any time soon!  It is with much pride, respect, and froth that I'd like to congratulate the 11 Time World Champion: Kelly freaking Slater on his feats, his dominance, and his perseverance throughout his entire career!  Hats off to you mate!

ยบ Make sure you mute the shit dubstep track in the video above and replace it with this one:
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